Oh good. It’s the New Hampshire primary today. Anthems of joy.
If you detect snark in my voice, you’re half-right. I’m half-snarking. I love voting. Anyone who has read this blog knows I love voting. I am a votin’ fool. But these elections are starting to feel as drawn out as the commercial “holiday season” that starts …actually I think it just restarted itself. Our nation’s adrenal glands are already shot from the “soaring” rhetoric of these candidates’ speeches, fear-inducing attacks, and tear-jerky patriotism. I’m so very tired.
I’m also very tired of trying to keep track of who all is still in the race. Some of these candidates are easy to remember, being as they are America’s id on two legs. Some of these candidates are…not. Do you remember that luke-warm glass of water you drank yesterday? No? Well you drank one. You did. And you have no idea you did. Would you vote for that glass of water? What exactly are we talking about again?
Somewhere between Id Two-Legs and Somnolent Water Glass we have the rest of the field, many of whom are clinging on for dear life. But after tonight, we will have blessedly fewer to keep track of. My many sources (really only one source) tell(s) me that at least three candidates will have to drop out tonight because of their poor showing.
So get out there and vote, New Hampshire. Vote your conscience. And clear the field. The rest of the country thanks you.
We’ll miss you, Dan Hicks. (1941 – 2016)