I’m baaaaack… (also: Funk Friday: “I’m Afraid of Americans,” David Bowie)

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Hello, friends!  It’s true – the rumors of this blog’s demise were premature.

I am back from my extended hiatus and THANK YOU for still hanging out while I was gone.  My trip to the store to get more ice took longer than I thought, but I came back, and the party is still going on in my house!  How cool is that!

Those of you who follow the news, or really wake up, exist, and go back to sleep at all, will probably agree with me that this has been a sucker punch of a week.  First, we lost David Bowie.  THEN, we lost Alan Rickman.  AND THEN, we had a GOP debate.  The only thing that’s been going through my head has been this song, from Bowie’s “Earthling” album, and it pretty well sums up all of my feelings about this whole stupid, awful, terrible week.  So sorry to deviate from the standard funky funk, but Bowie and Brian Eno nevertheless did come up with a pretty rockin’ beat.

 

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Funk Friday: “Sleazy” + “Closer,” DJ White Lotus (NB: Parental Advisory)

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In honor of the day before Fear Day (check out Valentine’s Day from the blog last year), and all of the single humans out there, here is one of the best pop mash-ups of all time. This is one awesomely twisted duet between a lecherous dude and a woman who couldn’t care less. Apologies (mostly) for the profanity and lewdness.

Modernism Monday: “Rise,” David Guetta feat. Skylar Grey

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So, most of last week was spent in what we call “an exercise.” It simulated an invasion scenario and my job was to monitor how the Blue team (aka “the good guys”) defended their country against the Red team (aka “those rat bastards”) – and then see whether there were ways to make it more interesting. It was about as much fun as you can ever get paid to have, and it was absolutely exhilarating, exhausting fun. The stress of the whole week, though, was also oddly exhilarating, and it served to remind me that, unfortunately, I am often the best captain of my ship in a gale.

Back when I worked on a boat for a summer, the single-most valuable thing I learned was that the only way to safely steer through rough water is to point the prow of the ship directly into the oncoming waves and hold steady. It turned out that, for some reason, of all the people working on that ship, I was the most skilled at this. We sailed through three major storms and I was at the helm for each. During one such time, the waves were so high that, as we crested them, the schooner’s wooden underbelly rose out of the water before gravity and momentum tipped the shrieking vessel downwards to meet the oncoming surge. The memory of the force with which that little 88′ schooner slammed into the waves remains in my bones. So, too, does the astonishment that we didn’t become a mass of floating splinters.

I don’t know if I’m necessarily a person of extremes, and I don’t think I actively look for rough waters. But as my spiritual advisor, Dorothy Parker, put is, “They sicken of the calm, who knew the storm.” Fare forward, voyager.

Introducing…Friend Week!

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Hi guys!

 

Rumors of my demise are premature, but assumptions of my life sucking me elsewhere are right on the money.  To that end, I have enlisted the help of seven friends to get me back on track while I’m traveling again this week.  I assigned each of them a day of the week, according to their musical tastes, and asked them to pick a favorite song in that genre.  They sent me a link to the song and I wrote a response.  Then they sent me the reasons why they picked it.  I hope you enjoy the results.  Tune in tomorrow, Tune-Up fans!

I’m alive! I swear!

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Everyone!  I’m so sorry to drop off the face of the earth.  This blog *does* still exist, and I *will* still be updating it.  I just had to take a temporary hiatus.

Please enjoy the Ting-Tings while we recalibrate to return you to your regularly-scheduled programming.