I’d like to learn how to fish. I don’t really know why. I guess it just seems like something a normal, calm, reasonably happy person would do in their spare time. I don’t know whether I’d classify my hobbies as such, given I don’t classify myself as normal or calm. Come to think of it, I don’t really know what my hobbies are.
The dictionary defines a hobby as “an activity done regularly in one’s leisure time for pleasure.” By that logic, the following things could be hobbies of mine:
- Holding a wedge of cheese and eating it like an apple with the fridge door open, at night, with the lights off
- Avoiding Swiffering my floors
- Noodling aimlessly on my piano
- Walking aimlessly around D.C.
- Staring off into space
- Taking a Buzzfeed quiz when I should be [fill in anything remotely more useful than taking a Buzzfeed quiz]
- Reading a New Yorker profile of someone interesting, regretting my degrees and career choices, frantically opening my computer, and searching for jobs in the profile-ee’s field
- Daydreaming of how great life would be as a [insert profession of New Yorker profile-ee]
- Looking at real estate I’ll never be able to afford unless I abandon reason, ethics, and hope
Anyway. Here’s a song about a trout.