Dudes and dudettes, I’m not going to lie – I’m a little grumpy. Who has two thumbs and doesn’t have the day tomorrow? This girl. I mean, it’s Presidents’ Day, for God’s sake. It’s a mattress holiday. Unfamiliar with this term? I coined it. Let me explain. A mattress holiday is one around which every major sleep accoutrement store in the country hawks their mattress for “40, 50, even 60 percent off!” Just turn on your TV or your radio and sit through an hour and you’ll see what I mean. It only happens around Presidents’ Day, Lincoln’s Birthday, and other interesting yet minor and ultimately “huh?”-inducing holidays. So while I am thrilled some of my readership is getting a third day of weekend, you’ll forgive me if I want to make the price of admission a perfect score on a fifty-question test on Chester A. Arthur.
Beyond my annoyance of having to go into work when the rest of humanity will be out buying TempurPedics (as our founders would have us do to observe this most august – oh the hell with it), this is going to be a bananas week for your Yankette. Work will go into hyperdrive, marathon training will go into hyperdrive, other things will go into hyperdrive – it’s just all going to be a little manic. I need a good, grounding, up-tempo, pump-up song to get me ready to suit up. “Knock It Right Out” will do just fine, I believe. Everything about this song – from the perfect swagger tempo, the shrieking guitars, Westerberg’s growly voice – says, “I got this.” So – bring it.
Enjoy your mattress.